Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Tall Women Unite

Today I have already met 2 other women who are as tall as I am. I had a 15 minute conversation with one woman about what it is like to be tall. She was in her 40s and had two 10-year-old girls, who were obviously going to be pretty tall adults themselves. We talked about how she was nervous for her girls to grow up in a world that makes it very difficult to be tall and female. I told her I had the same fears for this little girl that I'm growing.

We talked about what it's like to fly coach with super-sized femurs. We talked about what it's like to never be able to find pants that fit in a normal store and how expensive it is to pay for being tall once you do find clothes that fit. We discussed the woes of finding tall maternity clothes. We talked about what it's like to have extremely low self-confidence as a result of having the fact that you are different being pointed out constantly. We both had the same idea to make shirts that say, "No, I Don't Play Basketball!" I felt completely understood. She told me it was like therapy to talk to me and kept apologizing for taking up my time, but I loved every second of it.

For obvious reasons, all but one of my girlfriends over the course of my life have all been way shorter than me. When I met my friend, Joanie (5' 11''), in Colorado it was like my life changed. Before that, I had never known what it was like to be friends with a girl who could look me straight in the eyes. I loved her, not only because she was an amazing friend, but because she understood. Unfortunately, she lives on the other side of the country from me. I miss her terribly sometimes.

Anyway, I feel refreshed today because I feel understood once again. Instead of being disregarded and told how I should be grateful for my height by someone who has no idea of what it's actually like to be tall, I have talked to an older woman who has walked in my shoes. She did nothing but relate with me. We are all born with different personalities, and for those of us who do not crave attention, it is extremely uncomfortable to live in a body that makes you different from most women and by it's nature makes it impossible to hide the fact that you are different.

Of course, I love the fact that I will probably never look stocky in anything I wear and I'm grateful that I can reach things on the highest shelf. I know that God put me in this body for some reason and I am learning to love it. I think tall women are beautiful and if this little bean inside of me is going to get more of the tall genes than the short ones (there aren't many) I really want to show her that being tall is something to be proud of. Still, I am more than aware of the obstacles she will eventually face and I am thankful that she will have a mama who understands what she's going through.

7 comments:

skylana said...

honestly... i still get freaking shocked every time i remember you really are pregnant.

i kinda love it cause its like being surprised over and over.

Flo Paris said...

Skylana-hahahahaha.

Erin-
1. I LOVE how you call every bone by it's real name ("supersized femurs"). It's one of my favorite things about you. Also I love how you always refer to the blinker as the turn indicator. Random, but the femur thing made me think of that.

2. "look stocky" hahahaha. I could NEVER imagine you looking stocky. That is just such a hilarious adjective to associate with you.

3. You are beautiful, and I love you!

Erin said...

Flo...and that is EXACTLY why you are my very best friend in the whole world. I love you too (despite our 12 inch height difference!)

Beth said...

I don't know why...but this made tears come to my eyes! It's precious how you are concerned over even the small things your little girl is going to have to face, like getting asked all the time if she plays basketball or being uncomfortable sitting on a plane. Ahhh, if only I could be such a good mom some day....

The Talley Family said...

I am not tall as you know, but my sister-in-law is 5'10. She married my brother who is 6'3. They call themselves Team Tall. It's funny.

Oh and you look so adorable pregnant. Congrats again :)

Erin said...

Bets - It is incredible the kind of heartbreak and joy you open yourself up to when you become a parent. When your child gets love from someone else, you feel it. When they feel pain, you feel it too. While I'm way more concerned with my daughter being "discriminated" against because of her physicality (i.e., being made fun of, never finding clothes that fit, missing out on dates because she's taller than all the guys, etc.)I do also worry about the little discomforts as well. It's just what moms do. :) You'll be an excellent mama someday and worry about things you never thought you'd worry about before. It just happens. :)

tallgirl said...

I just found your blog, and of course, this post caught my eye. As a 6' woman (in flats), I understand everything you have posted. From the coach seats (and always gunning for the exit seat!) to finding pants that fit. Until college, I was the tallest girl in my school.

Now, in my 30's, I love my height, and have learned to embrace it. Although, I still dream of the day that I can walk into a store and walk out with new pants that are long enough, instead of going home to find them online with a long inseam.